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This is to all the comment spammers that have been here before and and who are coming here for the first time: Go jump in a dumpster!  I keep seeing all these lame futile attempts to put advertisements for Vicodin, Viagra, Pr0n, .edu offers, credit cards, fuckin’ mortgages, etc. in comments on my blog.  Well you can forget about it, because you’re NEVER going to see them show up.  Maybe if you actually sent me some free Vicodin, I’d consider leaving your comment.  Comment Spammers, do yourself a favor, and go jump in a dumpster! 

Last week I was faced with a challenge.  I needed to transfer 108,998 files in 15,524 folders totaling 215GB in size from one hard drive to another on a server.  Many people are too quick to trust a hard drive along with windows copy.  But these two are not always perfect.  Anyone who has ever copied an .avi from one hard drive to another only to have it not play correctly on the second hard drive knows what I am talking about.  Sometimes files get messed up, bits and bytes get written incorrectly.  Data integrity is threatened.  So how could I be sure that all of my files were copied correctly before deleting them on the source hard drive?  Well this was rather easy with a product called ViceVersa.  ViceVersa verified my data after it was copied. 


All the files and folders I had to copy


3 hours spent copying the files to the new hard drive


ViceVersa begins by asking you the source and target locations to compare.  In my case, this is two different hard drives.


ViceVersa compares all the files in the source and target


ViceVersa finished in minutes comparing files and folders, confirming that they have identical filenames, paths, sizes, and various attributes.  However this initial compare tells us nothing about the contents of the files.  I had to go one step further.


To compare the contents of the files, go to the Lists menu> Verify> Verify/Recompare Source(s) and Target(s) using CRC


ViceVersa compares the contents of all files’ CRC values.  This took a few hours.

ViceVersa is a great way to make sure backups are done properly.  ViceVersa Pro version 2.0 is currently available from http://www.tgrmn.com/ .  I recommend this product.

 

Question: Is there a way in Access 2003 to print a directory list using the dos dir command?  I want to add all the subfolders in a given folder into a table.
by Ro Chabot

Answer:
by Sean Henderson

Yes.  You can use the oldschool dir command from DOS using VBA’s Shell command.  This method however would be cumbersome because we’d first have to launch cmd.exe, pass it the parameters to dirlist to a file, then open the file, parse each line before inserting into the table.  Instead, a better approach would be to use ADO and the FileSystemObject to insert the subfolders into the table.  The FileSystemObject also gives us a lot of information about the subfolder that we can’t easily get from the dir command.  In this example, I will create an Access 2000 format database in Access 2003, and demonstrate this.  I will also include my demo mdb for download at the bottom.

Step1: Open Access 2003 and create a new database called subfolders.mdb

Step2: Create a table in design view

Step3: Add two fields to the table: The first one’s field name is "FolderName".  It’s datatype is Text.  Set it’s FieldSize to 255.  Make it the Primary Key (no two subfolders in a folder have the same name ever).  The second one’s field name is "CreatedDateTime".  It’s datatype is Date/Time.  You can add more subfolder information to this table later if you like.  Close the table, save it as "tblSubFolders".

Step4: Create a new form in design view.

Step5: Add two command buttons to the form.  If a command button wizard pops up, click cancel for both buttons.  Set the caption to the first button to "use command dir print to txt file."  Set the caption of the second button to "insert subfolders to table using ADO"

Step6: Now we want to code these buttons.  To add VBA code to a button, right click the button and select "Build Event…" from the popup menu.  The Microsoft Visual Basic editor will open and this is where we will enter the code.

Code for the first button:

[code lang="VB"]

Private Sub Command0_Click()
Dim x As Integer, command As String

command = "dir c:*.* > c:test.txt"
x = Shell("cmd.exe /c" & command, vbHide)

' after this, you'd have to parse the text file before inserting
' fuck that. use ado instead

MsgBox "The dirlist has been created."

End Sub

[/code]

 

Code for the second button:

[code lang="VB"]

Private Sub Command1_Click()
' Add list of subfolders and createdtime to a table in access 2000
' Coded by Sean Henderson
' 2007-03-01
Dim FSO As Object, objFolder As Object
Dim fld As Object, fyl As Object
Dim n As Integer
Set FSO = CreateObject("Scripting.FileSystemObject")
Dim cmd As ADODB.command
Dim strSQL As String
Dim strFile As String
Dim strFullPath As String

Set cmd = New ADODB.command
cmd.ActiveConnection = CurrentProject.Connection
cmd.CommandType = adCmdText

' wipe the table
strSQL = "DELETE * FROM tblSubFolders"
cmd.CommandText = strSQL
cmd.Execute

' set your parent folder here that you want subfolders from
Set objFolder = FSO.GetFolder("C:Documents and Settings")

' fill tblSubFolders with the folder names and created date
If objFolder.SubFolders.Count Then
For Each fld In objFolder.SubFolders
lDirNum = lDirNum + 1

strSQL = "INSERT INTO tblSubFolders(FolderName, CreatedDateTime) VALUES (" & _
Chr(34) & fld.Name & Chr(34) & "," & Chr(34) & fld.DateCreated & Chr(34) & ")"

cmd.CommandText = strSQL
cmd.Execute
Next fld
End If

Set cmd = Nothing
Set fld = Nothing
Set objFolder = Nothing
Set FSO = Nothing

MsgBox "The Subfolders have been succesfully inserted"

End Sub

[/code]

When you click on the first button, it will tell the command prompt to print a directory list to a file.  I decided not to code the rest of what I mentioned earlier because it’s a waste of effort.  When you click the second button, it will add all the subfolders of a given folder to the table tblSubFolders.  First it wipes the table clean of any records that are in it so that we can start fresh each time.  Next it tells the FileSystemObject which parent folder we want to get subfolders from.  If the parent does indeed have subfolders, then it loops through them and inserts each subfolder and its creation date.  You can add more subfolder information later if you want.  Below I’ve included a table of other subfolder information you could get from the FileSystemObject if you wanted to add it.  Also notice that when you view the table after clicking the button, all the subfolders and their creation date are in the table now.

Properties of the Folder object
taken from http://www.aivosto.com/visdev/fso.html
Property Description
DateCreated Date and time the folder was created.
* this is the one I used
DateLastAccessed Date and time the folder was last accessed.
DateLastModified Date and time the folder was last modified.
Drive Drive letter of the drive where the folder resides.
Files A Files collection containing all the files in the folder.
IsRootFolder True if the folder is the root, False otherwise.
Name Sets or returns the name of the folder.
ParentFolder Returns a Folder object representing the folder’s parent folder.
Path The path of the folder, including drive letter.
ShortName The short name used by programs that require the old 8.3 naming convention.
ShortPath The short path used by programs that require the old 8.3 naming convention.
Size The size, in bytes, of all files and subfolders contained in the folder.
SubFolders A Folders collection containing one Folder object for each subfolder.

This is just a very basic example I made to get you started.  You can download the database in this example below.

download subfolders.mdb

 

Red Light Chicago

Last night, Chris Ohara and I went to the Red Light pan Asian cuisine in Chicago.  Bon Appetit magazine labels it, "one of the ten best Asian restaurants in the country."  Both the atmosphere and service were superb.  Upon approaching the restaurant, we were greeted by trees covered with red Christmas lights, which illuminated the sidewalk in ambient red.  We entered through one of those swivel doors.  We made reservations, but arrived nearly a half hour early, yet they had us seated immediately.  The main entrance had a large statue of a Buddha.  The ceiling was dimly lit by a series of what looked to be upside down red isosceles pyramids.  Red Light had waiters who did nothing but make sure that everyone’s glasses were always full of water and that the tables were always clear of unused plates.  I asked our waiter
about the restrooms, but instead he directed me to "water closets," a series of doors with a unique old school style bathrooms no larger than a closet.  Did I already mention something about some of the best chefs in the world here?

Grand Entrance

That swivel door I mentioned.

Tables & Chairs

Each table came with a candle-lit lamp, chop sticks, and silverware for clumsy people like me who can’t maneuver chop sticks.

Big Buddha

I’m not actually sure what that is, I’m guessing that its a Buddha head.  In back of the head you can see the kitchen area where the chefs work their magic.

Red Lights

These unique upside down isosceles pyramids dimly lit the entire room in red.

Green Lantern

This drink, served shaken not stirred in a martini glass, is made from Midori, Raspberry Vodka, a splash of Sweet & Sour, and garnished with a spiral-cut of lemon peel.

Chinese Egg Roll

This is one of the best egg rolls I have ever eaten, seriously.

Teriyaki Ribeye

Extremely tender, thinly cut, medium well Ribeye steak smothered in Teriyaki Sesame Sauce, coupled with Wasabi Mashed Potatoes.  This steak had no fat on it whatsoever, and the potatoes really had a hint of wasabi in them.

"Mee Gha Ti"

Stir Fry Chicken, Rice Noodle, Madras Curry Coconut Sauce, and Chili pepper.  The tiny chili peppers (located near the top in dark green) were extremely hot and spicy.  My understanding is that you eat one to cleanse your palate.  In other words, if you want to go from tasting one item to another, you would eat a pepper in between to clear your taste buds before eating the next item.

Lemon Mascarpone Berry Tart

Lavender Ice Cream, Ginger Anglaise, topped with neatly arranged slices of strawberries with blackberries on top… (or is it raspberries? not sure)

Jackie’s Chocolate Bag

Imagine a miniature grocery bag made out of thin chocolate, filled with Belgian White Chocolate Mousse, Raspberry Sauce, fresh berries, and whip cream with a leaf to garnish.

The Bill

Leaving a 20% tip brought our meal total to $125.  Our waiter, Nathan was so incredibly helpful, enthusiastic, and informative that I feel bad for not leaving him a 30% tip.  Though this probably isn’t comparable to dining at the Lumière, I feel the price was right.  The dinner was fabulous and service was outstanding.  I will definitely dine here again sometime.  And with that, I recommend Red Light to any of my friends in Chicago looking for somewhere fine to dine.

Red Light
820 W Randolph Street
Chicago, IL 60607
(312) 733-8880
Google Map

 

The scenario is all too familiar.  You buy a laptop at the store because it was cheap, it was on sale, or maybe you just went ahead and blew two grand on it.  You get home, open it up, and are greeted by a myriad of startup programs and trial software.  The machine runs mediocre or maybe even slow.  You wish you could make the machine run faster but you don’t know how.  This is about the point in time that I receive a phone call from some random person asking me to clean up their new laptop in exchange for money, food, or liquor.  So, what’s the trick?  I’ve been asked by so many people that I decided to write a guide to get you started.  I’m writing this just weeks before the official launch of Windows Vista, Microsoft’s next generation Operating System, so this will be outdated for sure in the near future.  This guide covers Windows XP only.  In this exercise, I bought a cheap Toshiba laptop and three commercial pieces of software
to do the job.  (I got a second more expensive laptop to double check my article.)  Believe me, this is not rocket science as some might think.  Let’s get started now shall we?

This guide makes use of the following items:

  • A brand new Toshiba Satellite laptop (approximately $500)
  • A second Toshiba Satellite laptop (over $1000)
  • External USB hard drive ($200 or less)
  • Microsoft Windows XP Professional Edition SP2 OEM (approximately $150)
  • Acronis True Image 9 ($50)
  • Driver Magician 2.8 ($30)

A quick summary of what I’m about to do:

  • Identify the problem with this new laptop
  • Backup the laptop with Acronis
  • Backup the drivers with Driver Magician
  • Wipe the laptop and install Windows XP Pro clean
  • Restore the drivers
  • Optimize the cleanly installed Windows XP Pro

Section I: Overview of the Problem


click the picture to view it full-size

A picture says a thousand words.  This first glance screen shot shows 58 programs hogging 279MB of ram (the more expensive laptop had 74 programs).  There are about a dozen or so icons in the System Tray.  The desktop is littered with advertisements for Office 2003 trial, America Online 9 badware, eBay, broadband providers, Yahoo Music, Buy at Toshiba Direct, MSN, and various Google apps.  After a few moments, I get a popup for McAfee trying to sell me software upgrades (McCrappy Antivirus).  Nice! I’ve had the laptops open less than five minutes and I’m already being hit with advertisements.  I suspect that maybe these advertisers pay the laptop makers money to insert their software into new PCs with the hope that some people will buy into these offers, thereby allowing laptop makers to sell at a lower price.  In any event, all this garbage is bogging down the new laptop.  What should we
do about this nuisance?  Wipe it!  But before doing so, we should back up the computer just incase something goes wrong.


McCrappy Antivirus Ad


74 running programs! click the picture to view it full size

 

Section II: Backup the Laptop with Acronis

First I’m going to backup the computer with Acronis True Image 9.  By doing this, I can always restore the laptop to its original state if I want to return it to the store (which I probably will).  Acronis will create an image of all the data on the new computer’s hard drive.  We need a place to store the image that has more free space than the total size of the new computer’s hard drive.  For this, I’m using a 500GB external USB 2.0 drive.  This section is optional; you don’t have to do it unless you want to.  Also, Acronis is not the only solution to this; Alternatively you may also want to try Symantec Norton Ghost or PowerQuest Drive Image.

examples of external 500GB drives:


Cavalry CAUE37500 3.5" External Module Hard Drive With 7200RPM 500GB USB 2.0


Western Digital My Book Premium 500 GB External Hard Drive with Dual Interface ( WDG1C5000N )
 

Step 0: Buy and Install Acronis True Image 9, and plug in your external USB hard drive.

Step 1: Start the Acronis True Image application

Step 2: Click Backup from the Task List


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Step 3: The "Welcome to the Create Backup Wizard" dialog opens.  Click Next>

Step 4: Select "The entire disk contents or individual partition" option.  Click Next>


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Step 5: Tick the checkbox for Disk1 or C:.  This is the hard drive we are backing up.  Click Next>


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Step 6: Save the image file to the external hard drive by typing in a File name.  In my case, I called it "E:toshiba.tib" where E is the drive letter for my USB hard drive and toshiba.tib is the name of the image I’m about to create.  Click Next>


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Step 7: Select "Create new full backup archive" option.  Click Next>

Step 8: Select "Use default options" option.  Click Next>

Step 9: Type something in Archive Comments to describe the image.  Click Next>

Step 10: The details of the backup are shown.  Click Proceed to begin the backup.


click the picture to view it full size

 

Section III: Backup the drivers with Driver Magician

I’m about to use Driver Magician 2.8 to backup all the device drivers on the computer.  If you have a computer that is older than 2001 which meets the minimum requirements of Windows XP, then this step is probably not necessary since XP would automatically find all of the drivers.  In most cases though, XP will not find all the drivers.  Backing them up with Driver Magician will save us the hassle of having to install them one by one or search all over the internet for missing ones.

Step 0: Buy and Install Driver Magician 2.8

Step 1: Click the dropdown next to Backup and select "Search Non-Microsoft Drivers" from the menu.


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Step 2: Tick all the checkboxes next to the red drivers you want to backup (the non-Microsoft drivers are shown in red).  Click Start Backup.


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Step 3: Select a folder to backup the drivers to.  Click OK.  (Note here that I have created a folder "E:toshiba_driver_backup" ahead of time)

Step 4: Driver Magician asks you if you want to continue backing up to the folder you just selected. Click OK

Step 5: Allow a few moments for the program to find and backup the drivers. When Congratulations comes up, close Driver Magician.

Section IV: Wipe the Laptop and Clean Install Windows XP Pro

This section is about wiping the laptop and doing a clean install of Windows XP Pro.  What exactly does that mean?  Quite simply, wiping your computer means erasing everything off it completely.  Doing a clean install of Windows means that you’re installing Windows from scratch with no programs or crap whatsoever.  Think of this process like changing the oil in your car for example.  You dump out the old nasty oil and replace it with fresh new oil.  Easy.

Make sure the computer can boot from CD-ROM before the hard drive (Skip to Step 3 if your computer is already set to boot from CD-ROM)

Preliminary Step 1: First we have to get into the computer’s BIOS. On many computers, this is usually done by pressing F1, F2, or Delete when the computer is first turned on (some computers have different keys). This first black screen that comes up is usually referred to the POST screen (POST stands for Power On Self Test). Usually at the bottom of the POST screen, it will tell you what button to press to enter SETUP.

Example of a POST Screen.  Notice the "Press DEL to enter SETUP"

Preliminary Step 2: Once you find the correct button to press, press it to enter the BIOS Setup. Various computers have different BIOS setups. Use the keyboard to move around until you find the boot order. Once you find it, make sure it is set to boot from CD-ROM before Hard drive. Usually there will be instructions on the right side indicating how you move the CD-ROM up and the the Hard Drive down.  If the computer does not have a floppy drive, then make sure the CD-ROM Drive is at the very top of the list.  Once you are finished, make sure to Exit Saving Changes.

Step 1: Insert the Windows XP SP2 OEM CD into the CD-ROM.  If you set the computer to boot from CD properly, than you should be prompted with "Press any key to boot from CD…"  When you see this, press a key on the keyboard.

Step 2: Setup takes a few moments to load drivers and the installer. When "Welcome to Setup" appears, you should see an option for "To set up Windows XP now, press ENTER." Press Enter.

Step 3: "Windows XP Licensing Agreement" appears. Press F8 to agree to it.  (I’m assuming you’ve read it and if not, your lawyer has.)

Step 4: The next screen will tell you that a Windows XP installation is damaged and will give you the option to repair it. We want to wipe this clean instead. Press ESC to continue installing a fresh copy of Windows XP without repairing.

Step 5: The next screen shows a list of partitions. Our goal here is to delete all the partitions, then create a new one. Start by highlighting C: Partition1 [NTFS], then press D to delete it.

Step 6: A warning message appears. Press ENTER.

Step 7: A confirmation message comes up. Press L to delete the partition.

Step 8: When finished, you should see only one item in the list labeled "Unpartitioned space". If the computer has multiple partitions, repeat Steps 5-7 for each partition until there are none left.

Step 9: Press C to create a partition.

Step 10: The next screen will ask you to enter a size. Just leave whatever the default is and press ENTER.

Step 11: Now you’ll see C: Partition1 [New (Raw)]. Highlight that, and press ENTER to install.

Step 12: Highlight "Format the partition using the NTFS file system" and press ENTER to continue. Setup will format the hard drive (wiping it clean). Then it will copy over installation files. Finally it will reboot. This may take several minutes. After the reboot, don’t press any key to boot from CD. Just allow it load Windows Setup. After it boots back up, you’ll wait until there are about 33 minutes remaining before a dialog pops up.

Step 13: Regional and Language Options appears. Click Next>

Step 14: Enter your name and your company. Click Next>

Step 15: Enter your product key. This is located on the COA label that came with the copy of Windows XP Pro. Click Next>

Step 16: Enter a computer name. You may also set a password if you want. Click Next>

Step 17: Select the correct Timezone and make sure the time is set correctly. Click Next>

Step 18: If Windows does not recognize your network card, it will skip the Networking settings in which case goto Step 20. Otherwise, when you see the Network Settings dialog, select Typical Settings, and click Next>

Step 19: Leave it set to WORKGROUP. You can change this later. Click Next>

Step 20: Setup will continue installing files. This will take several minutes.

Step 21: After rebooting a second time, Windows will greet you with a Welcome wizard to setup your computer. You can use this to create users if you like. I usually just skip it and go straight to Administrator by holding in the power button for five seconds until the machine shuts off, then turning it back on.

Windows XP Pro SP2 is now installed.  The last thing I do before removing the Windows XP CD from the CD-ROM tray is set it up so that Windows never asks for the CD ever again.  This is very easy to do in two steps: Copy the i386 folder from the CD (D:) to the local hard drive (C:), then run cabpath.vbs to change the install dir from D: to C:.  Do this:

Step 1: Right-click the Start button and select Explore from the popup menu.  This opens Windows Explorer.  Click (D:) in the left pane to show the CD contents in the right pane (where D is the drive letter of your CD-ROM).  Click and drag the I386 folder from the CD and drop it on Local Disk (C:).  This will copy the I386 folder from the Windows XP CD to your hard drive.  This will take a few minutes.


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Step 2: Download cabpath.vbs and open it.  Change the path to "C:" (without the quotes), then click OK.

If you’re having trouble doing this part, check out the "Insert CD" fix article; I think that’s where I got this idea from originally.

Section V: Restore The Drivers

Step 0: Install Driver Magician 2.8

Step 1: Run the Driver Magician program

Step 2: Click the Restore button and navigate to the folder we backed up the drivers too.

Step 3: Tick all the Checkboxes for all the drivers, click Start Restore.


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Step 4: Click OK to the warning message that restoring drivers will freeze up the machine for awhile.
(note: in some cases, a dialog may come up asking you to insert some CD to find a file. There’s a good chance the files are all in the backup folder, so look around in there. also, windows may complain that a driver has not passed some certification rubbish. always continue anyway)

Step 5: Reboot when your finished.

In the event that some devices are not found, you may have to go to the manufacturer’s website or hunt down the driver on a site such as Driver Guide.

Section VI: Optimize the cleanly installed Windows XP Pro

By now, you are at a point where the laptop is usable.  Before I finish, I like to go through and tweak it a bit to optimize the laptop for speed.  When I finish, the computer will look like Windows 98 in the sense that I’ll get rid of anything that may slow down the performance of the machine including the blue theme.  Also note, that I have written this guide specifically for a person whose laptop I recently worked on that requested I write this guide.  Some of the parts may be biased so beware.  This part may be done differently by different computer people.  If anyone disagrees with anything I write in this section or has suggestions for anything I may have left out, please leave comments.  Rather than go step by step, I’m simply going to list a series of things I did to the new laptop.

Get rid of Windows XP Tour. 

  • Click on the little icon for Windows XP Tour, then click Cancel from the dialog that comes up.

Get rid of Security Center Tray Icon. 

  • Double click the little red shield tray icon to open Windows Security Center. 
  • Click "Change the way security center alerts me." 
  • In the Alert Settings dialog, uncheck Firewall, uncheck Automatic Updates, uncheck Virus Protection, then click OK. 
  • The red shield will disappear immediately.

Optimize Display Properties.

  • Open Display Properties from the Control Panel or open it by right-clicking on the desktop and selecting properties.

  • Click the Themes Tab.
  • Click the Theme dropdown and select "Windows Classic" from the list.
  • Click the Desktop Tab.
  • Set the Background to None.  (This will speed up the boot up of the computer since windows won’t have to load a picture into memory.)
  • Click the Screen Saver Tab.
  • Turn off the Screen Saver: Click the dropdown under Screen saver and select (None) from the list.
  • Click the Power… button to open the Power Options Properties
  • Under the Power Schemes Tab, set all three options for Plugged in, to Never.  That is, set Turn off monitor to Never, set Turn off hard disks to Never, and set System standby to Never.  For Running on Batteries, I set them a little different to conserve on power.  Set Turn off monitor to After 2 mins, set Turn off hard disks to After 5 mins, set System standby to Never.

  • Click the Hibernate Tab.
  • Untick the Enable Hibernation checkbox.
  • Click OK to close and save the Power Options Properties.
  • Now your back to the Screensaver Tab of the Display Properties dialog.  Click the Appearance Tab.
  • Click Effects to open the Effects dialog.
  • Untick all the checkboxes, then click OK.

  • click OK again to save and close the Display Properties.

Taskbar Properties

  • Right click the taskbar and select Properties from the popup menu.
  • Under the Taskbar Tab, Untick the checkbox for "Hide inactive icons."
  • Untick the checkbox for "Group similar taskbar buttons."
  • Click the Start Menu Tab.
  • Select the Classic Start Menu option, then click the Customize button next to Classic Start Menu.
  • In the Customize dialog, scroll down and Untick the checkbox for Personalized Menus.
  • Click OK to close the Customize dialog.
  • Click OK to save and close Taskbar Properties.

Bring back good old Quick Launch

  • Right click the Taskbar, and select Quick Launch from the Toolbars submenu.  This gives you the desktop and IE shortcuts as seen in Windows 98.

Setup Windows Explorer

  • Right click the Start button and select Explore from the popup menu.  This opens Windows Explorer.
  • In Windows Explorer, click the View menu and select Status Bar so it has a check by it.  Click the View menu again and select Details.

  • Click the Tools menu and select Folder Options to open up the Folder Options dialog.
  • In the Folder Options dialog under General tab, select "Use Windows classic folders" option.

  • Click the View tab.
    • Select "Show hidden files and folders"
    • Uncheck "Hide extensions for known file types"
    • Uncheck "Hide protected operating system files"
    • Uncheck "Use simple file sharing"

    • Click Apply to All Folders, then choose Yes from the confirmation dialog.
    • Click OK to save and close Folder Options.
  • Put a Shortcut to Windows Explorer on the QuickLaunch bar:  Navigate to C:Windows on the left column.  Then in the right column, Scroll down until you find the Windows Explorer command (it looks like a folder icon.)  Click and drag the Windows Explorer command to the QuickLaunch bar and drop it next to the IE shortcut.  This makes it easy in the future to open Windows Explorer.

  • Close Windows Explorer

Adjust for best performance

  • Open System Properties by Right Clicking My Computer and selecting Properties from the popup menu (or find it in Control Panel).
  • Click the Advanced tab.
  • Under the Performance frame, Click the Settings button to the open Performance Options dialog.
  • Under the Visual Effects tab, Click "Adjust for best performance."
  • Click OK to save and close Performance Options.
  • Click OK to close System Properties.

Disable DCOM vulnerability

  • download DCOMbob from www.grc.com
  • Run DCOMbob.exe.
  • Click the "DCOMbobulate Me!" tab
  • Click disable DCOM
  • Close DCOMbob (without rebooting, you can reboot later).


    click the picture to view it full size

Disable Windows’s internal Spyware

  • Download xp-antispy 3.72
  • Run xp-antispy
  • Check All the boxes, then click "Apply Settings."
  • Leave "Clear pagefile at shutdown" unchecked if you want the computer to shutdown a little quicker.
  • Leave "Disable auto-updates service" unchecked if you plan on using Windows Update for security updates.
  • Leave Disable ZIP functionality if you don’t plan on installing WinRAR.  I highly recommend WinRAR.

Disable unnecessary Windows Services
Read the article I already wrote on this, or just download and run the registry script I’ve created based on BlackViper’s recommendations.

You can probably do any number of additional tweaks to make Windows XP scream.  I’ll let you use your imagination on that one.  Once your all finished tweaking the crap out of XP reboot the machine.

When I bought the laptop at Best Buy, the sales guy talked about having the Geek Squad run a bunch of optimization tweaks on the machine.  I looked into this a bit and found out they they use an in house tool called the MRI Customizer.  The current version at the time of this writing is 2.8.  They expire every so often, and then the headquarters issues them a newer version.  Lets take a look at this.

Running the Geek Squad MRI Customizer 2.8

Run customizer.exe (if the CD rom is not set to autorun).

If you work for the Geek Squad, then you must first agree to the terms of use.  If you do not work for the Geek Squad, then you must exit this program and skip this entire area.


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System Customization Tasks: This is an overview of all the tasks that Customizer will perform.  Install Antivirus and Antispyware are just automated installs for Trend Micro’s PC-Cillin Antivirus and Webroot’s SpySweeper antispyware applications.  Before using those, the customer has to have already purchased licenses for either application.  They are unchecked by default.


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Agent Tweaks: This step applies a series of optimizations for the computer that were organized by the Geek Squad in a registry file called agenttweaks.reg.


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Uninstall Unnecessary Applications: This is like a glorified Add/Remove programs from Control Panel.


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Shortcut Manager:  This deletes shortcuts from the desktop and Start Menu.


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Startup Manager:  This allows you to uncheck items that you don’t want to start up with the computer.  The less startup items you have, the faster the computer will boot up and perform.


click the picture to view it full size

Services Manager:  This allows you to quickly disable any non-microsoft services that are running.  The less services you have running, the better your computer will perform.  Be careful though, some of these may be needed if you have antivirus applications installed.

click the picture to view it full size

Windows Updates: This is clever.  Instead of downloading all the Windows Security updates off Windows Update, this tool installs them directly from files on the CD.  This saves time and uses no bandwidth whatsoever. 


click the picture to view it full size

The MRI Customizer completes.


click the picture to view it full size

After finishing all the optimizations, reboot the computer.  The last thing I do when I’m done is defragment the hard drive.  After this, the computer will be running as good as it will ever run.  It’s all downhill from here after installing programs and things that bog the machine down.  My final optimized computer has only 11 running programs using less than 70MB of memory.  If you open Task Manager, you will see there is no scrollbar.  If there is a scrollbar, then you probably have lots of running programs which slow down your computer.  This isn’t the most optimized it can get either.  If you want to really get crazy, run windows with no services at all.  I just like to keep mine running smooth.

John Chow might create some of the fastest computers the world has ever seen.  I just take ordinary computers and make them run as fast as they possibly can.  Does your new laptop run like a champ?  Mine does.

Free Scholarship Guide

Question: What’s an easy way to rip audio CDs into MP3s?
by Shawn Schroeder

Answer:
by Sean Henderson

Use Audiograbber 1.83.  It’s free, and its easy.

Step 1: Install Audiograbber 1.83

Step 2: First Time Preparation

The first time you run Audiograbber, there are some things you should setup first before ripping.  Once you have set up these settings, you will never have to do them again.  In the future, you will just start with Step 3.

First, tick the checkbox by the MP3 button.

Next, click the MP3 button to open up the MP3 Settings dialog. Use the following settings:

  • Tick the option Direct Rip and Encode MP3 file
  • Tick the checkbox for Use ID3v1Tag
  • Tick the checkbox for Internal Encoder
  • Select from the dropdown Lame DLL Version…(whatever it says)
  • Change the bitrate to Variable Bitrate
  • Choose ABR (Average) from the method dropdown
  • Drag the bitrate slider over to 192Kbit/s
  • Click OK to save the settings.

The MP3 Settings box should look something like this:

Now go to the General Settings dialog by either clicking the settings button, or going to the Settings menu> General Settings. The most important part here is to make sure CD Rom unit is set to the correct drive that you plan on ripping your CDs from.  Other than that, I only changed four things from their defaults:

  • Untick the box for Artist name
  • Tick the checkboxes for both Artist as directory and Album as directory.
  • Change the directory to store files in, to C:Documents and SettingsAdministratorMy DocumentsMy Music, where Administrator is whatever your username is in Windows XP.  If you’re not sure, just leave it as C:audiograbber.

The General Settings box should look something like this:

Step 3: Rip the Audio CD to MP3

Insert an audio CD into your CD-Rom.  Click the Refresh button if the CD doesn’t automatically show the tracks.

Once the tracks show up, you’ll see a list of Track 1, Track 2, Track 3, …, Track n for all the tracks on the audio CD.  Click the Freedb button (has a penguin on it) to connect to the Freedb database which automatically renames all the tracks to their appropriate titles.  In this way, you’ll have real song names instead of a bunch of track1.mp3, track2.mp3, track3.mp3… crap.

If Freedb successfully found the audio CD in its database, then you should have a list of song titles from the album.  In my example, I put in Pantera’s 101 Proof album.

Click the Grab! button to begin ripping!  This is it, and you’re basically done.  Wait for the CD to fully rip.

This is just a quick and easy way to make mp3s.  I’d be interested in hearing other peoples’ ideas regarding this topic for anyone who either disagrees, or has found a superior method.

Question: How do I send an email with a picture in it without sending it as an attachment?
by Rob Nussbaum

Answer:
by Sean Henderson

If I were to send an email with images in it, but no attachment, then I would send an HTML email with the image stored on a web server somewhere.  In this particular example, I’m going to send an HTML email via Outlook express using the free service Photobucket.  First I’m going to upload my image to Photobucket, then I’m going to use the HTML code from Photobucket in Outlook express to send the HTML email.

Step 1: Uploading an image to a web server:

Go to http://photobucket.com/ and either signup a new account or log into an existing account.  Then upload your image to Photobucket.  In this case, I’ve uploaded an image of a devilbat.  Copy the code from the Tag textbox.  This will be the HTML we use in our email.

Photobucket’s Tag code looks like this:

[code lang="HTML"]

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

[/code]

Note that the Photobucket code includes a link to Photobucket.

To remove the link, delete the all the crap out to get this instead:

[code lang="HTML"]

[/code]

Step 2: Inserting the HTML code into an email in Outlook Express

Open Outlook Express and Create a new email.  Click on the Source tab to show the HTML source code to the email.  You’ll notice that Outlook has already inserted a bunch of code.  Look for the <DIV> and </DIV> tags.  You want to paste your Photobucket code between those tags.  Then click back over to the Edit tab and finish writing your message.

That should get you started.

The Binding Break-Up Contract
by Stac3y

There seems to have been some confusion regarding division of property and space since we have broken up. YOU, hereafter referred to as the Dumper, do not retain the same rights to such things as ME, hereafter referred to as the Dumpee. Clearly the Dumpee has been wronged (except in certain situations, see Section 1(b) below), and thus retains more rights than the Dumper. To clarify, I have assembled a crack legal team to outline this document, so that you will quit being a complete and total prick. Actually, not all of these things apply to us, but for the sake of friends, family, and members of the general public who have also been Dumped, Ive included other situations.

This document applies only to those relationships that involved terms such as boyfriend and girlfriend, not couples who have taken that long argumentative road-trip that ends in the State of Matrimony. Caveats have been made for engagement, as most rules still apply.

Section 1: Terms of Separation (hereafter termed the Breakup)

(a) The rights of the Dumpee shall be directly proportional to the severity and immaturity of the methods of Separation used by the Dumper. For example, a Dumper (hereafter termed a Good Dumper) who breaks up with Dumpee face-to-face, in person, in a private place, and outlines issues which the Dumpee was aware of, and in fact is not too surprised at, with said discussion ending in a tearful hug cherished by both parties, and perhaps an incident of Goodbye Sex, shall not be severely punished. However, a Dumper who breaks up with a Dumpee in an especially cowardly way, such as over the phone, through email, or by having a friend tell the Dumpee, shall experience extensive limitations on rights after the Breakup. Most severely punished shall be those Dumpers (hereafter termed a Bad Dumper)(hereafter termed Assholes) who repeatedly Breakup and then Beg Forgiveness, and Dumpers who have Cheated.

(b) Exceptions to the Dumper/Dumpee division of rights are as follows: Dumpees who provoke the Breakup by avoiding the Dumper until such time as the Dumper feels forced to end the relationship. Dumpees who intentionally get caught Cheating and are shortly afterward, Dumped. These Dumpees shall be considered as Dumpers for the purposes of this document.

Section 2: Division of Property and Space

(a) Material Property
(1) If the Dumper is a Good Dumper, all material property that Dumper brought to the relationship shall be returned to the Dumper. Likewise, all property the Dumpee possessed before the relationship shall be returned to the Dumpee.
(2) If the Dumper is a Bad Dumper, or an Asshole, Dumpee has the right to destroy or sell any property left for any period of time in the Dumpees possession. This includes, but is not limited to, furniture, electronics, kitchen wares, clothing, CDs, and cars. Dumpee is aware that destruction of items holds a possibility of legal ramifications and continuous retaliation, and destroys Dumpers property then at their discretion.

(b) Gifts
(1) Dumpee retains all rights to gifts he or she received during the relationship, especially expensive ones. In the case of a Good Dumper, Dumpee can determine whether return of these gifts is acceptable. If the Dumper was female, and the Dumpee was male, and said parties were engaged, and said engagement ended in a Good Breakup, the engagement ring should be returned to the Dumpee. If the Dumpee does not want the ring, the Dumper can sell it on Craigslist and split the profits with the Dumpee. Bad Dumpers and Assholes retain no rights to jewelry or cars.
(2) Dumpee can, if feeling spiteful, box up all gifts received from the Dumper and return them to Dumper with a tear-stained letter. Dumper should feel sufficiently bad, and should not, under any circumstances, maintain possession of these gifts in order to give them to future Girlfriends/Boyfriends. Said gifts should be sold and Dumper is then welcome to use the money to take a vacation to Tahoe and hopefully, break their leg skiing.

(c) Exchange of Property
(1) If the couple was living together, and the Dumper has moved out, the Dumper should send a friend to pick up his or her belongings. The exception is a Good Dumper, who may be on sufficiently good terms with Dumpee to come back and retrieve their own things. If this is the case, it should still be done while the Dumpee is Not Home. Bad Dumpers and Assholes forfeit their belongings, as outlined in Section 2: (a)2.
(2) If the couple was living together, and the Dumpee has moved out, the Dumpee will send a friend to pick up his or her belongings at an appointed date and time. Said friend will not be late and will not linger. Said friend may make a few rude remarks to the Dumper, but such remarks should be brief and to the point. Again, if the Dumper is a Good Dumper, the Dumpee can pick up their own belongings when the Dumper is Not Home.
(3) If the couple did not live together, exchange of property should be done in public at an appointed date and time. Both parties shall be on time and shall not linger. Again, rude remarks shall be brief.
(4) Items not claimed by the Dumper within one calendar month after the Breakup are the property of the Dumpee, unless exchange of property arrangements were made prior to the end of that month. Likewise is true for items not claimed by the Dumpee.
(5) Items that Cannot Be Found by either party shall be considered a lost cause after one month. If it was really that important, you shouldnt have let that idiot have it.

(d) Big Ticket Items
(1) If the relationship included the purchase of a car, a house, a prize-winning show dog, or other such item of which you now both have dual legal ownership, you are in Deep Shit. Maybe you should have thought about making that kind of investment together before you pissed your whole life away? Wait until youre married, dumbass.

(e) The Pet
(1) See Section 2: Article (d)1 first. If you still want to deal with the Pet (hereafter termed the Dog), well continue. Dogs that were owned by either party before the commencement of the relationship shall return to their original owners. Dogs acquired during the course of the relationship shall preferably go with the owner who gave them the most care. Cmon, you know theres one of you who did all the feeding, the training, the walking, the pooper-scooping, the leash-buying and the ball-tossing. The Dog goes with that one. Except in the case where that person is a Bad Dumper or an Asshole, in which case, Dumpee retains possession of the Dog. There shall be no Split Custody, or Visitation Rights involving the Dog. Its not good for the Dog, and its not good for you. If all things regarding the Dog were absolutely equal, then a Poll of Friends may be taken, or a Coin may be Flipped. Decisions made by PoF or CF about the Dog are final. If you did not get the Dog,
and you are distraught, wait 2 weeks until your head clears, and then go to the Humane Society and get another one. You will be much happier that way.

(f) The Kid
(1) Sigh. Okay, first see Section 2: Article (d)1. You are an idiot. Havent you heard of birth control? Well now its not just you in this boat, so a lot of the earlier terms and conditions about Dumpers and Dumpees may not apply. Even if your Breakup involved a Bad Dumper or an Asshole, you will have to be nice, for the Sake of the Kid. This is really outside the range of this document, so go to court and try not to screw up your Kids life any more than you already have.

Section 3: The Friends

(a) The Dumpee gets the Friends. Sorry, dems da breaks. If you were smart about picking your relationship, you were dating somebody who was not from your immediate circle of friends, so when you Breakup, you each go cry to your respective group and everything is dandy. Unfortunately, many friends become Booty Calls, which can then become That Girl Im Sorta Dating, which can then become Your Girlfriend. Relationships over one year also have a high incidence of Combined Friends. Regardless, the Dumpee still gets the Friends! But there are some details/exceptions/conditions associated with the possible future division of Friends, so here they are:

Specifics of Division of Friends

(1) In the case of a Good Dumper, Split Custody is acceptable. Within the first 6 months, a Good Dumper has the right to still hang out with the Friends, but only if the Dumpee is not present. After 6 months, it is acceptable for the Dumper to call the Dumpee and request mutual access to the Friends. If Dumpee is amenable, the two may attend a party or barbeque together with the Friends. The Good Dumper is at all times aware of the Dumpees feelings, and will be the first to leave if things get awkward. After one year, expect normal Friend-Dumper-Dumpee interactions to resume. If you got dumped by a Good Dumper and you are all hanging out again after a year and youre totally cool and youre not strongly reconsidering getting back together, then Damn. Hes probably gay. Thats cool that you guys are still friends though. Maybe you can shop and stuff.

(2) In the case of a Bad Dumper, Visitation Rights are acceptable, under some circumstances. Bad Dumper only retains Friendship Rights with his or her Best Friend, and then, only at Best Friends discretion. Everyone else is fully justified in telling you to piss off. After one year, a Split Custody arrangement may be made, but Bad Dumper is never to be allowed at a party that the Dumpee is attending. This must be enforced strongly by Friends and the Dumpee.

(3) In the case of an Asshole, no rights are retained regarding the Friends. Not even to the Best Friend. You fucked up but good, so now go find yourself a bunch of shallow, selfish people just like yourself, so you can all get drunk and stab each other in the back. This also applies to such Dumpers described in Section 1; Article (b), as those Dumpers who pose as Dumpees are especially despicable.

(b) Relationships with Friends after the Breakup

(1) Under NO circumstances is a Dumper allowed to sleep with any of the Friends after the Breakup. ESPECIALLY the Dumpees Best Friend, but truly, there are NO exceptions. Even if she says its okay. Even if you guys have a long talk about it and she says its fine and she wants you to be happy. You better take a good look at a girls Friends before you get Committed, because if you would ever like to possibly sleep with one of those girls, you should not enter into the Relationship. Good Dumpers who break this rule can then be qualified as Bad Dumpers. Sleeping with the Best Friend immediately qualifies you as an Asshole. (Best Friend can also then be Broken Up With, and most of the terms of this document apply.) Remember, Assholes are open to justifiable destruction of property, and are often deserving of a swift kick in the Balls.

Section 4: The Neighborhood

(a) The Dumpee retains all rights to the Neighborhood, including but not limited to, grocery stores, shopping malls, dog parks, coffee shops, bars, hang-outs, strip malls, carwashes, and restaurants. If the Dumper sees the Dumpee in one of these places, the Dumper must immediately leave. The only exception is a Good Dumper who is back on Good Terms with the Dumpee, especially one year or more after the Breakup. See Section 3; Article (a)1 for details.

All terms of this document are not legally binding, but they make a hell of a lot of sense. Don’t be an Asshole, and your life will be so much easier.

(In case you didnt get it, this means I get the stuff, the friends and the hangouts. Quit whining about your freaking sweatshirt and stay the fuck away from me.)

Windows XP by default comes with a bunch of useless services enabled that waste memory, take up CPU time, and open up security holes.  About a year ago, someone told me about this guy on the internet called "Black Viper" who created a table of all Windows XP’s useless services.  One of the columns was called "Safe" which "is the configuration that 95% of the people will be able to use with little side effects."  One day, I installed a clean copy of Windows XP Pro SP2.  Then I went through all the services’ default settings after the install, compared them to Black Viper’s table, and created a new list of only the services that were changed from Automatic to either Manual or Disabled by Black Viper.  I used this configuration many times on hundreds if not thousands of computers with minimal complaints from people.  For the most part, this configuration seems credible.  I marked four services in red that might need to stay set to Automatic
depending on the person’s needs.  The rest are pretty much garbage as Black Viper asserted.  Below is the "Safe" list that I put together:

Set these services to Disabled as suggested by Black Viper’s "Safe" settings:

  • Computer Browser
  • Error Reporting Service
  • Indexing Service
  • Net Logon *might need to keep this automatic if doing a net use command from a remote machine*
  • NetMeeting Remote Desktop Sharing
  • Network Location Awareness (NLA)
  • Network Provisioning Service
  • Portable Media Serial Number Service
  • QoS RSVP
  • Remote Desktop Help Session Manager
  • Remote Registry
  • Secondary Logon
  • Security Center
  • Server *keep this automatic if doing file and print sharing*
  • Smart Card
  • SSDP Discovery Service
  • System Restore Service *keep this automatic if you want the ability to go back to a "last known good configuration" *
  • TCP/IP NetBIOS Helper
  • Telnet
  • Uninterruptible Power Supply
  • Universal Plug and Play Device Host
  • WebClient
  • Windows Time
  • Wireless Zero Configuration *keep this automatic if using windows to configure wireless networks*
  • WMI Performance Adapter

Set these services to Manual as suggested by Black Viper’s "Safe" settings:

  • Distributed Link Tracking Client
  • Help and Support
  • Logical Disk Manager

For awhile, I used to disable all these services one by one using services.msc which took a lot of time.  To speed things up a bit, I created a registry script to disable them all at once in one click–a real time saver!

download the .reg registry script

I spent a few hours double checking everything in this registry script.  I’ve had great success with this method.  I am however open to suggestions or skepticism.

Lord of War : AK-47


Lord of War (2005)

          YURI ORLOV (V.O.)
Of all the weapons in the vast
soviet arsenal, nothing was more
profitable than Abtomat
Kalashnikoba model of 1947 more
commonly known as the AK-47, or
Kalashnikov. It’s the world’s most
popular assault rifle–a weapon all
fighters love. An elegantly simple
9-pound amalgamation of forged
steel and plywood. It doesn’t
break, jam, or overheat. It will
shoot whether it’s covered in mud
or filled with sand. It’s so easy,
even a child can use it, and they
do. The Soviets put the gun on a
coin. Mozambique put it on their
flag. Since the end of the Cold
War, the Kalashnikov has become the
Russian people’s greatest export.
After that comes vodka, caviar, and
suicidal novelists. One thing is
for sure, no one was lining up to
buy their cars.

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